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First written on 29th Feb 2020, am porting this article from WordPress.
To me at least, it’s based on the following important “big matters”
However, from a practical standpoint, if one isn’t financially secure ie having multiple streams of passive income and/or having a surplus of savings or income, it’s really hard to pursue what is important and good to us.
The evil is being broke, being enslaved by long hours of meaningless work, being apart from things, people and causes that truly matter.
That is why many die with regrets on their death beds – look, I’m not gonna mince my words, but at the end of the day and end of our lives, we don’t typically think of “hey I wish I was at work…” but:
Most of the regret of the dying, as shared by a Bronnie Ware, a palliative nurse’s perspective (in her book: The Top Five Regrets of the Dying):
1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
“This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.”
2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.
“This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret, but as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.”
3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
“Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.”
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
“Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.”
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.
“This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content, when deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.”
And this is part of the reason why I have increased my joy and happiness by at least a good 10x after leaving my previous company that was founded by myself and my wife, EVEN when, in their bid to retain me, offered me to draw as much salary as I wanted from the company but I have a different calling.
A higher calling.
Of course, equally as important, is that I have finite time and energy – I want to spend time doing what I enjoy doing with who I want to work, grow and have fun with. It’s my choice. And I want to stay true to myself, and choosing happiness and freedom for myself and my loved ones.
It was scary and fearful, but looking back during that time, I will do it again in a heartbeat – I don’t miss them at all. I do miss the therapists whom I love and care for dearly, and have so much feelings for, but after seeing how less than 1% of them reached out to me…it’s data for me to recalibrate (though this doesn’t take away my care and love for them.)
(Although to add, after living for 3 years with very low salary, it taught me to live with less, so enticing me with money didn’t quite work, and neither did their loud noises work so…oh well).
So, let’s start with first, with helping my readers, clients and myself to first and foremost to earn more money and then transition to build multiple streams of passive income, as well as a dedicated personal development, mindset, success habits section.
I wrote that as I submitted my resignation to the other company that bought my physio and hand therapy practice then, as I had seen and gathered enough evidence (data) that it wouldn't be a good place to stay for long term.
Of course, I was locked and bonded in for 3 years so I couldnt leave them from 2017 to end 2019, which meant I got to experience them for a full 3 years front row.
I prayed about it for a very long time, seeking God's advice and answers to my question if I should stayed or go. For the first 2 years, I didnt hear any specific answers but in the 3rd and final year, it got much clearer to me the peace that I felt when I was to leave.
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