are you ready to create the life you deserve and have been dreaming about?
The world is a big place and it can be overwhelming.
what should I focus on?
what should I do?
where should I go?
what happens if and when I fail?
I've failed, and it hurts/sucks - what now?
Those are just some of the questions that can stop us in our tracks.
I get it.
My first job was hard. My probation was extended and extended. My
supervisor didn't understand me or the shock that I was going through.
Other bootlickers got promotions and increments after increments. But I
couldn't even pass my fucking probation.
My relationships was terrible and dramatic, of extreme negative lows, jealousy, fighting, insecurity. I was the one who "always tolerated" and "always left behind"
was constantly broke and having to borrow just to pay the rent, and to
eat cheap cheap food (I regularly bought cans of tuna to make multiple
meals). My take home was about $1300 at that time, and I can say, after paying rent of $600, living on $700 was very, very hard. Was in perpetual credit card debt.
My relationships with my parents were shit, and I didn't want to meet them cos my life sucked and I was broke. I couldn't take them to places to eat nor give them anything.
In 2014, my dad died 17 days in a hospital, 9 months away from his retirement. This broke me and my entire families hearts. We still miss him today.
And there were many, many more examples of shit I went through.
Pretty sure it's not just me.
I thought to myself and thought life was supposed to suck, and that's the way my life is supposed to be. And hoped that "things get better".
dead on the inside and quarter life crisis at 27
I continued this was of automatic / automated living, basically a reactive-passive approach to life, with learned helplessness, telling myself shit like "life's like that" - a meaningless, floating-around kind of life.
I didn't speak or share this with anyone (I didn't know I could or should have talked to someone about this), but I was actually deeply unhappy, unfulfilled and clearly demotivated.
Life just suck.
I was disgusted with myself, my life and the events that seem to plague me for years.
I know for sure I don't want to continue living like that.
I was pretty much lost until my first "awakening", when I was 27 years old, when I realized that I was living in a broken loop, of failures after failures, again and again. And what made me extremely unhappy was that it seems that I was DOOMED to repeat it again and again.
Unless I changed the decisions I made, and actions I take.
In this heightened awareness state, I asked
myself, was there a hidden lesson that I was supposed to learn or
something I'm supposed to do to "exit" this repeating hell?
That was in 2007.
I started to turn my life around, beginning in 2007, when I was 27 years old.
I started devouring business, relationship, spiritual, marketing, finance and personal development books
I quit my dead-end job and started my own business (which eventually grew to 7-figures per year, beyond my wildest dreams)
I improved my relationships with my family and parents
I got myself a serious relationship with a wonderful woman who loved me, believed me and now is married to me with kids. She's also my wonderful business partner =)
Then my dad died. All of a sudden, after 17 days in a hospital. My father's death in 2014 was pretty impactful on me - it woke me up to not waste time or get hung up on things that aren't important (easy to say but stuff still gets to me of course).
Today, at 2019, years later, I'm still searching for ways to continuously improve myself.
I figured that I can get most of whatever I want...
as long as I visualized and dreamt it (vision & dream)
as long as I decided/determined it (will & decision)
as long as I take massive and continuous actions that bring me closer and closer to the dream daily (doing & action)
...in life, business, finance, spirituality and all its subsets. Subsets are like the world of health, it can be about losing/gaining weight, getting rid of eczema/condition etc.
This open-endedness fascinated me endlessly - cos there's so much I can improve, learn and do! Look at Success Principles which drives successes, achievement and fulfillment.
But at the same time, I figured that life is very open-ended, and there is both beauty and pain in that,
because it's so open-ended, some get very lost, some get very freaked
out, and some coast, and some find life so beautiful, some come up as awe-inspiring winners.
But is success a lottery system? Is winning luck of the draw?
In some cases, it seems to be - being born into rich and powerful families...with lots of money and influence and the ability to get whatever you want.
But is that really the case?
It seems like it...until one realizes that being born into that family, may carry heavy expectations, be it:
to act and behave a certain way
to treat / use people a certain way
must only participate in the family business
must only marry/mingle with spouses the family chooses
Of course, being born dead broke into a family with extreme poverty has its fair share of shit too.
I'm just trying to show both sides of the coin.
What I'm trying to say is that, whatever you've been born/given/talented with, use it for the best you-and-your-gifts can be and bring to the world.
from lost...to finding some answers to the puzzle
After being utterly disgusted with my life, work, money and results - I finally snapped at 27 years old. It was my first awakening and such clarity came to me in the forms of basic understandings of how things work.
And how I can get more success, the kind of success that I want.
That was my first realization of heightened clarity and awareness.
I started to ask myself:
what do I do
why I do / did what I do
where did those habits or actions come from
I realized that typically, there are two kinds of outcomes or results:
Results we can control and influence.
Results we can't control nor influence.
And I also concluded that results that we cannot control nor influence - it's an utter waste of time to bawl, bitch, focus or complain about it - the results of that won't change - results we cannot control nor influence, do not waste time on that.
other people's reactions, thoughts, feelings (yes we can influence a little, but it's not ours)
principles such as gravity, time
So that means that we can and should only focus on results or outcomes that we actually can control or influence. Examples of this:
our own emotions
our own thoughts
our own energies
our own goals
our own plans
our own desires
You'd see that the main thing that we truly can focus are ourselves, and hence the term "personal development" is 50% "personal" - it's for us to learn and grow.
extreme ownership, accountability, visualizing, dreaming, doing and persistence is the root to success
Owning our own
is the #1 way to grow, progress and develop in life.
Yes, I am not a completed work yet and I am still in the process of continuous growth and refinement. Refining, growth is an ongoing process.
It's not rocket science, but it's more of an intuitive approach to life, growth and personal development.
It is also a conscious process, and requires a lot of courage and mental, emotional and spiritual processing/awareness capability.
i want to win. i want success. and growth. (And I want you to win, succeed and grow too.)
First, I got tired of my own bullshit and excuses and shit.
So, I started fixing my life.
Then, I got tired of listening to my and my bosses' bullshit.
I knew I was being marginalized, so I tendered. My intuition was right when I saw my ex-boss smiling upon receiving my resignation letter. Outcome? I found a freelancing job that gave me a take home of $4800 in the first month. That's a whopping 369% improvement to my take home.
That got me started on my entrepreneurial journey, since 2008.
Created a business that earned more than $5M+ revenue generation, hiring 25+ individuals in the 10-years I was there, and I exited for my sabbatical and to focus on projects and people whom I loved.
Paid off my home with bit of cash leftover too.
I got tired of the roller-coaster relationship with my ex.
She made it "easy" in the sense she got married (it was sort of shocking cos we were in a on-off relationship), but it also shook me to wake up too. I found a wonderful woman who loved me but I also worked on becoming an awesome man, boyfriend and husband.
meditating / praying
going to church
investing/building Passive Income Machines
making decisions to love, respectful and gentle in my actions, projects
And much more.
i invite you to join me to creating the life that you deserve and dream of. Let's do it together.
Let's succeed in life, business and more!
join me in intuitive, loving, gentle and good success and self mastery that actually matter. no hype. no bullshit.
Hang around here for some time, you'd see that I don't
well with hype or bullshit. I can smell that typically a mile a way, and
I hate that shit too.
I've been working on myself and on
NigelChua.com for years, since 2006, and only in late 2019 I started to
focus on intuitive and loving leadership, entreprenership and personal
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Hello, and welcome to NigelChua.com!
I'm the founder and writer of this site as well as senior hand therapist and director at Phoenix Rehab Group (phoenixrehabgroup.com).
Also husband, father, Christian, entrepreneur and dividend stock investor.
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