In June 2016, I wrote a piece called Defiance: The Importance Of People Who Don’t Believe In You, and I shared on how defiance to norms that people wished to inflict on me, or people who wish me fail, created very strong and intense energies and inner strength for me to push myself forward, to prove to them that I could make it.
I want to go deeper into this.
Defiance to me, is very personal and meaningful, because to me, it leads me towards where I want to go and become/be, rather than join the common crowd who tries to knock everyone else into the same mould. I know that you know, like myself, how that feels like.
when you work/school and where people dislike you because you're different, or because you stand out, or because they just don't like you
We see this everywhere we go, and I find that, in a very sweeping statement, at least 80-90% of the people fit into this category. It is the 10-20% of us that stands out, voluntarily or by no choice, and defy what social norms and groups try to do to us.
And because 80-90% of the people are the norm and average, great – let them lead the average lives, draw average pay and do things average.
I expect more from my readers, whom I believe are intelligence, honesty/truth, loving and courageous. These 4 traits are very important.
- With Intelligence, you can understand, accept and see the differences between living an average life and living a life that is meaningful; and you can understand why people do what they do, and why/what you need to do for your own journey
- With Honesty, you can see and understand the truth, and the truth will set you free. Many individuals live like the Sleepers, who sleepwalk their lives away (read: Are You Sleeping Still?), drifting. Honesty wakes you up to reality, and you then choose
- Courage – to give your the inner strength to determine and decide what you want to live your life for, a larger purpose and vision and mission (mine is to love Christ, love my family, serve my tribe and make my therapists and readers build passive income streams)
- Love – to choose to nurture, give and love individuals such that they grow in their personal growth journeys and mature as individuals and bring their own to the world
Defiance poured a lot of energies and focus into the first 3 parts of my initial journey of life, which are Intelligence, Honesty and Courage; so most of my focus during 2002 – 2016 focused on:
- Intelligence: how to be a super therapist, how to build a therapy business, how to market a therapy business, how to handle cashflow and finance etc
- Honesty/truth: focus on building solid skills as therapists, and an authentic therapy business that served a market who wants/loves our services/us
- Courage: the strength to keep the above 2 points ongoing, and at the same time to keep facing all the challenges we face and grow above them and overcome them since 2002 till today.
It was only later during the maturation stage where I started realizing that I have an immense love for therapists, and I wanted to help them live and build richer lives and therapists, by giving them options and solutions and opportunities to not only build 6-figure annual incomes, but how to invest for the mid-long term such that their lifestyle will be sustained by income-producing dividend stocks – it is now my love for them that keeps me going, and this emotion is stronger than ever before.
But I do not forget, how it all started, which is truly my sense of Defiance and frustration with the way some of my classmates, colleagues, bosses sneered and jeered at me, and that energy kept me going.
The energy that made me just want to keep working harder and smarter to prove them wrong, and me right.
You know what, I'm glad it all turned out ok. As I mature and age, I have come to see that God is immensely good, and that He has good plans for me – we had worked hard together, and together with family and true friends and doctors who believed in us, we slowly worked our way up to build a super platform to help therapists, patients and doctors – I am immensely grateful for this.
And it's because of this that I'm immensely grateful to my detractors, naysayers and people who didn't support me – it is you who helped spur me to work harder than never before to improve my life and change my circumstances, it was great fuel to me. Defiance is one of the greatest fuel for me when I started, but today, my greatest fuel has become love – love for my God, my family, my therapists, my tribe.
Today, I no longer seek to defy my detractors (more because I want to focus on things that are more meaningful) so I consciously choose to participate in activities and pursuits that are meaningful to me.
But this is not to say I will not use Defiance as a fuel in parts or in whole for future projects, because I do tap on it still for projects; if you're in a midst of a Defiance-led project, I'm sending you lots of warmth, love and fuel – go for it and rock your world.